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The skies yesterday were blue but blessedly cool. All day long, I felt relaxed and groovy. Then, as the blue deepened into night, I turned to music to prolong that feeling. Now it's the next morning and I'm still feeling it, thanks in part to that song in my head. Since I'm all the time writing about distressing events, I figure the least I can do is share that with you too. Before the song, the backstory: Back in 1977/8, when I was in what would turn out to be my last year in high school, I used to hang out with the Iranian college student who rented a room from the elderly man on the top floor of our apartment building. (If you're keeping track of the stories scattered across my publications, this was after I left home briefly at 15 but before I left home for good at 17. ) Let's call him Said. Impious and apolitical, Said sometimes neglected his studies but rarely passed up an opportunity to have a good time. On the evenings when I wasn't out monkeywrenching gender with my gang of gay friends, I'd go up to Said's room, where we would do bong hits and talk about girls while he did his art homework (which always seemed to involve geometric patterns in psychedelic colors). One night, we broke the pattern by going to the house rented by two of his friends, one of whom was a fanatic. It turned out to be one of those nights when time stands still for a moment, like an accidental snapshot capturing something that you don't even know you're losing at the time. Imagine it with me: Three wealthy Iranian would-be playboys and one working-class blue-eyed lesbian high as kites, listening to Santana under a black light, united in innocent animal sensory happiness, sitting still for a moment as the world swirled around us. I didn't know that I'd [amitriptyline 50mg pills $126.00] be a college student myself the next year or a self-supporting 17 year-old college drop-out the year after that. They didn't know that, by then, an Islamic revolution would make it impossible for them to go home. None of us could have imagined that movie actor Ronald Reagan and former CIA chief George H. Amitriptyline 50mg pills $126.00 w. Bush would . And, who in the world could have imagined that would end up winning the Nobel Peace Prize or that George H. W. Bush's pot-smoking son would end up with his finger on the nuclear button and his eyes fixed on Iran? I certainly couldn't have guessed that, almost 30 years later, I'd be listening to the amitriptyline 50mg pills $126.00 same songs on my ipod while walking the dog after doing my morning chores at the chicken sanctuary. Nope. We couldn't have imagined any of that then. And: We don't know what's going to happen tomorrow. The good news is: Things that don't seem possible right now can happen. That's as true for good things as for bad. So, we keep on trying to imagine the changes we need so that we can try to figure out how to bring them about. If we can do that while remembering that we don't really know what's going to happen, then we can be ready to seize any unexpected opportunities that present themselves. And if, along the way, we have the chance to feel happy and relaxed for a moment or an hour without hurting ourselves or anybody else, we seize that too. I quit getting high before I was out of my teens but (if I can say so without sounding like a cliched commercial for "getting high on life") I sometimes can get the same feeling -- or better -- by stimulating my brain with music and color. That happened this morning: The morning sun streaming through the green trees, the dewdrops on the grass glistening like a field full of crystals, the black black fur and green green eyes of the cat who came along on the walk, all accompanied by those psychedelic guitars. . . all of that juiced my brain better than any bong hit ever did. Which brings us back to Santana. Here's Samba Pa Ti [mp3 expired] from . Get yourself into a good space. Relax. Visualize tender green tendrils of honeysuckle vining and entwining, jungle vegetation in every green you can imagine rising and falling and rising again, or anything else so achingly beautiful that it brings you happiness even though you know that, like life, it can't last and will end up breaking your heart. Stay with the happiness without forgetting that the sadness will someday come. Listen. As usual, I'll leave the mp3 up for only a week. If you like the music amitriptyline 50mg pills $126.00, support the artist.


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